How can I keep from singing?

Winter. Gloomy, dreary, winter. I'm ashamed to say I've become a little scared of winter ever since we replaced the blustery, sunshiny Brisbane winter days with the cold, dark, miserable Melbourne equivalent just over seven years ago. Many of the darkest days of my short life have occurred during Melbourne's winter, and, try as I might, I never seem to shake off the feeling of dread when the days shorten and the darkness subtly begins to creep in. Oh, I know there is beauty, music, and poetry in these long months, but it is grey, melancholic, and causes my soul to ache. This year I'm finding it worse than usual, for I'm missing my sunshiny sister, Fiona, who is half-way across the globe. I'm glad she is fulfilling her dream to travel in Europe, and would not wish her here if I could, but oh, I miss her!

Music both helps and hurts me during these times. As a musician, I cannot help but find delight in determining the thoughts and cares hidden in my heart from the world and expressing them through melody and harmony. When winter causes these secrets to become burdensome and disheartening, even the music I play pains me, but it hurts more to remain silent. Oh, of course there are wondrous moments of joy interspersed in these months, but they are all-too-quickly swallowed up.

This year, I'm determined to fight these winter blues. I'm not doing a great job so far, I know, but I want to enjoy and acknowledge God's goodness all year round, not just when the sun is shining. My battle-plan is simple: I will sing. Yes, I'm determined to use music to my advantage in this case, consciously singing a song or two each morning, whether hymns, choruses, or songs by Christian musicians that I like. Singing is beautiful, anyone can do it, any place, any time, although some places may be more appropriate than others! No one sings exactly the same as you do, so singing praise to God is a very special personal worship and devotion. There are numerous passages in the Bible that draw attention to the importance of praise, but I fell into the trap of thinking praise was reserved for Sunday worship. Now I realize my error, I want to say like David the psalmist, "I will bless the LORD at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth." (Ps. 34:1)

Yes, winter is gloomy, but God is good. All the time. How can I keep from singing?!

What on earth am I doing here?!?!

Wow, this is just a little bit weird. Here I am, starting a blog that I'm on the verge of hoping no one discovers... which isn't really how it's supposed to be, I'm guessing. Most probably the whole point of typing out thoughts or fragments of thoughts and then posting them on the internet is that other people will read them then agree or disagree with you. Scary thought, especially when the typist happens to be a perfectionist, a peacemaker by nature, and a strangely muddled mix of both introverted & extroverted tendencies.

So, why am I doing this? Surely no one is forcing me to start this blog, I have no hidden agenda in starting a blog (i.e., I'm not recruiting people to join me in my efforts to take over the world... yet), and I really don't know where this whole adventure will take me. I could, I guess, give up this risky endeavour straight away and no one would ever know...

Nevertheless, I'm persevering for a little while at least, for I'd like you, whoever you are, to know a little about the strange human being who has intrigued you enough to cause you to read this wandering post.

I'd like to introduce myself, but I am afraid that means stating bald facts on a computer screen. Facts like, "I am Bronwyn Nicholson," and "I have 3 siblings, and am all the better for them." Terribly boring, I know, and yet to write a florid paragraph relating my life's history to you is the other extreme, which, whilst more interesting reading perhaps, feels a bit too melodramatic for my liking! So, I'm afraid you'll have to form your own idea of who I am from the few truths I will eke out from time to time. It will have to suffice for me today to tell you I am a 19-year-old Christian girl, seeking to glorify God and grow in faith day-by-day through the work of the Holy Spirit living within me. :-) These are the most important things about me, but I promise I will elaborate in later posts, whenever they may occur.

Thanks for joining me in my adventure. We've only just begun! :-)